I am enjoying the heck out of this guava right now! ahh. The evenings are sure full on the weekends. Last night the band sang at Paudalho and as we were picking people up in Comby, one side road caught us. The four guys, begin gentlemen, got out and made me stay in the comby as they all push and rock the thing out of the ditch that was in the middle of the road. and all I did was laugh.
I figured it would be the same thing we did before…setting up in the center or something…but this was a real stage and everything. very neato. And since Sandra (the girl who sings with the band) was sick, Karine and I were singing–in Portuguese. It went well, and there was only two songs that I basically just smiled, moved my mouth (in “watermelon” style), and clapped to the music. After it was done, I went across the street and ate some freshly fried French fries, listened to the Christian “Foho” music (which is really cool traditional Northeast Brasil music) and wondered if life got any better.
Today I had planned on going to Fernanda’s house (one of the girls I had gotten close to last year) for lunch and then to church, but last night there was a horrible accident. it was on the road between Carpina and Paudalho (labeled “THE highway”) and her cousin was in it–he broke his leg. I found out later that the other car involved, the whole family died–father, mother, and two kids. so we will reschedule that. So I looked at pictures and thought about life and watched some of “Mission Impossible 2″ in Portuguese–dubbed movies are interesting just to try to read the lips.
Tonight at church was really special. we went to Carpina and the pastor there (who was in my English class), Joseman, and Ricardo (pastor at Guadalajara) were ordained. I felt honored to be there for the special occasion. I mean, that is one of those things that you will look back on with a big group of people and say “yeah, I remember that…I was THERE.” oh wow. I have been here almost a month now, and to tell you the truth, I cannot imagine being anywhere else. I feels so natural…so much like…home. no, I don’t know about the future–and hey, everything is changing for me this week and I have no clue about life…but really, it does not matter. because it is right. it just is. as a song I know goes “…’Cuz I know Your in Your heaven–yeah–with both hands on the wheel, and somehow this simple knowing has affected how I feel…”
We sang a song before the message and after the first verse I was like “hey, I know that song in English!” it turned out to be an old song that my mom used to rock me to sleep singing. I can still remember her closeness and long hair and her voice as she sung it “I want to know you Lord, much more than before, I want to know you Lord…Learn to see your face and the knowledge of your grace I want to know you…birds in the trees lift their voice to you…Lord I want to sing, Lord I want to lift my arms to you…”
The message was really moving. it was from Psalms 39:4-7 talking about how life is short and so our only hope is God. I could not understand all of it, and the microphone was up super loud, but then we got to a part where he (it was the pastor from Tracunhaem–who was also in my English class) was sharing about the accident earlier this year that killed 5 people from their church…and it was like I could suddenly understand everything. I think it was the emotion that I understood–the feelings he was sharing more than the sentences. How we have one life to live and it must be done God’s way. powerful.
Tomorrow I am going with Steve and Ann and the Moraes family to their apartment in Candeis (by the beach) until Wednesday. After that…well…you will have to wait and see right along with me.
Rachel
***
My mind is swirling with a thousand questions
people stop to offer me all of their suggestions
but reality is fading into the unknown
And I can’t see You reigning on the throne
an untraveled road darkens my view
each day I will awake to something new
the hesitation of anxiety with the thrill of adventure
standing alone, inside me blending together
I look up into the sky and find Your grandness
If You are big then I am small
If You are strong why should I fall
prey to every wind of wonder
that blows me in and my confidence asunder
I see the sun shining like gold
Each day it is new though I grow old
if You are rich then I am poor
and I must gather from Your treasure store
I look down and see my shadow
meeting with my feet
if You made me then I am Yours
and any need You’ll meet
****
I don’t know much of anything now
the story page is blank
I want it to be written right
and I want to enjoy rereading it
