April 25, 2006
-
I saw my
There is a bat in my room. He makes a regular habit to fly around the room twice and then leave. I think he waits until the one moment I am not expecting him. And yes, he does it on purpose.
It is such a beautiful thing to give. I always feel self-conscious and wonder if the person will like it…then I see the gratitude in their eyes and feel unworthy to give. I feel like it is a priviledge far to great for me to receive. To bless someone else makes a day worth living.
I am waiting. Like a child ready to leave the room and enter the world I want to step out into all that God has for me. I want to walk into the light and let it’s powerful rays burn me through, searching out my hidden motives. I feel like I have only begun to see—to imagine what all God has—what all life is. There is so much more, but it will cost me everything to find it, to attain. Is this desire an invitation from God or do I have to wait for something more official?
I feel like I am valuable. Like I am worth 1000$. Nice.
Instead of teaching school on Friday, we had a weekend conference for the leaders and their families here in Brasil. The first one in 13 years. About 50 of the most amazing people I’ve ever met were here—people giving and living for God. Good stuff. Ivana, Karine, Alyssa, and I took turns taking care of the kids for the parents. Since I am still learning Brasilian kids songs, I make most of the words up…much to Alyssa’s dismay and the kid’s delight. Heh-heh (my evil laugh). The Lord really blessed and refreshed the families. It also was very clear how Satan was not happy and working on dividing the brethren. Please pray for our spiritual protection.
I went to Timbauba early Saturday morning. I caught the wrong bus so ended up taking a transfer in Nazare…and saving a nickel in the process. Who woulda thunk? I bought a coconut, found the center of the center, sat down and sipped my coconut while watching everyone do their thing. I passed a bakery and thought I’d try something new, so picked out a nice pastry looking thing. The first bite was great, and then the second one I bit into a…prune? Rather surprising. I normally think of prunes being for old people. Perhaps because they are wrinkly. Or because my grandpa always had prune juice. But my stereotype is being broken as it was absolutely delicious in this pastry. Prunes. Hmm. I had a great English class and so many people are interested that next week I am starting two classes. And thus continues Rachel’s adventures with the bus system.
“The world would be a much cleaner place if we ate our own trash.” –Justin Lookadoo
What a concept…what a name…
I slept for 12 hours straight Saturday night. I think something is wrong with me. Ivana said it was probably because I was carrying around 3 of my little students at once in the pool while they were trying to dunk me.
Had a thought. Another theory. I listened to a song “…My love is not my own, it all belongs to You…” and realized that for my whole life long it is about giving my love to God…not just during the single years, God bless them. I have this vision of sending my love up to God…then when He decides and on whom He decides He sheds my love upon others. The problem comes when we try to give our love to people on our own. This is idolatry. Normally, for girls, this turns their love into some kind of addiction to guys. They serious think they can’t live without so and so…and so give anything to keep him. For guys this normally turns love into lust—perverted love. That explains a lot.
“Teach a man a rule and you help Him solve a problem; teach a man to walk with God and you help him solve the rest of his life.” –John Eldredge, “Waking the Dead.”
Okay, If you read “Wild at Heart” you can’t stop there. “Waking the Dead” is…if not better, almost better. Blow me away.
Comments (1)
Funny about the street signs – its kinda the same here – only the main streets usually have a sign or two on them. Keep up the good work in Brazil.