August 9, 2008

• in Brasil

  i crossed over “middle earth“ or whatever you would call the part of your life spent being transported and airport life–self-flushing toilets, self-running faucets, self-squirting soap, and being permanently attached to your baggage.

  it all passed quickly and it never feels quite real. but it is a definate three part transition
  1. USA is clear, Brasil is fuzzy
  2. Everything is fuzzy
  3. Brasil is clear, and USA is fuzzy

  i am sure there is a better word than fuzzy. i just don`t feel like finding it right now.

  Question: what do people do who do not have a Dad who looks them in the eye and says “You made the right choice.“?

  I arrived at the international school with a big hug from Daniel (4th grade), who then lead me to the other classes and i was pushed into a corner by waves and waves of children flowing out of their classrooms and chanting “Rachel! Rachel!”

  you think i am exaggerating. i am not.

  Returning to Brasil was not magical. it was familiar. just as i notice a chance when i go to the US of everyone being black or white, so returning to Brasil i noticed everyone turned back to a nice mixed brown again. a familiar brown. a familiar, melodic language. what was not familiar or magical was returning to the cold morning shower. i have a sudden urge to become French.

  i have so much STUFF. i always forget that until i have to unpack it all. because i try to bring the USA to Brasil and that is impossible. i ate my leftover dried cherries for breakfast. i’ve been eating them alot in Indy (because, yeah–i became vegetarian. for about a month now) but eating dried cherries in Brasil is completely different. Reading the same books i grew up with is different in Brasil. i guess it is the atmosphere. it affects me more than i know.

  i went to college last night. first time for me and for them. yep, i am the first American to attend there. and neither one of us is sure what to do with me. i have lost some of my Portuguese. about 25% of the lecture went over my head. another 25% was lost because i am taking the education major, and for some reason, all the guys are scared away. there is only one guy in the class. and i think they will scare him away too–because they are rather loud and chatty. but the 50% of sociology class was good. then she talked about tests, and i am getting nervous.

  no new news about Daisy yet…just praying. internationally. and i do not have personal internet access yet, so am writing this on a borrowed computer. but once i get everything rolling a little smoother…i will make sure to reply to all of your kind and gracious feedback and questions!

  • 1:00 pm
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