August 16, 2008
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a little stressed the past couple of days.
i think this whole TRUSTING GOD thing is a full time job. because i do really really well for the first five minutes or so. but then time keeps coming. and i lose my place.
here is something beautiful:
i talked with 5th,6th, and 9th grade about Daisy and the whole situation and we prayed together about it. every day i turn around to tugs on my arm of “Ms.Rachel, i am praying–did you hear anything new about the baby yet?” Thursday we were all close to tears and i wondered if i was right in telling them. it is so heavy. to put something heavy on the shoulders of children’s laughter feels like a sin. Friday morning there was rejoicing: “see Ms.Rachel?”
Hugo said “Ms.Rachel, i prayed that God would be with this baby. that He would save it and let it be with us, or if He would hold it in His arms.” Lucas let his tears drop onto his red shorts and said “I prayed to. Because God knows best.”
i felt like i was in a room full of faith. and beauty. and nothing could penetrate it. each day there are miracles. some days they just look more like what we think they should look like and we recognize them. some days we don’t.
i should have more news on Monday or Tuesday.
humor break:
Wednesday was my first attempt to answer a question in class (at college). i raised my hand timidly, but the teacher didn’t see me. great. off the hook. nope. the woman next to me loudly says “Rachel wants to say something!” the teacher still didn’t hear. by the teacher turns to me, seven or eight other women were loudly pointing at me and saying “the girl wants to say something! she wants to answer the question!” and by that time i had forgotten my answer entirely.
after a couple second recovery, i croak out my response in Portuguese. my former brilliant thought echoes in complete silence. either my answer was so genious-like that they missed it or i misunderstood the question entirely. either way…glad that is over with.
Monday: Scientific Method
Tuesday: Philosophy (i really like this teacher)
Wednesday: Epistemology of Education (basically the systematic study of education. they liked the big word. it took the whole class time to explain it)
Thursday: i teach English for the teachers at the International school and hang out with the Moraes’s
Friday: i am free–it is the weekend= Paudalho. maybe guitar lessons.yeah, i got out of class on Thursday and Friday because i had already taken those classes in the USA. I asked them about transferring my credits and they were pretty iffy about it. i then told them i understood i still needed to pay the same tuition and they were more than happy to comply with anything i said. ah Brasil…pais do meu coracao.
